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Separation/Divorce: Hoist With Your Own Petard
Hoist With Your Own Petard When people ask me what is necessary in order for a mediation to be successful, my response is “a willingness to cooperate and negotiate in good faith.” These are words of...
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Separation/Divorce: Do You Always Have to Have it Your Way?
Do You Always Have to Have it Your Way? Who hasn’t been there at one time or another; caught in a positional web of our own making because of a decision that at the time made perfect sense. But after...
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Buddies or Partners – The Anatomy of Post-Separation Relationship
Buddies or Partners – The Anatomy of Post-Separation Relationship In Buddies or Partners – The Anatomy of a Marriage, I explored the nuanced differences between what it is to be a buddy and/or a...
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How a Mediation Can Sometimes Feel Like Watching The Weather Channel
How a Mediation Can Sometimes Feel Like Watching The Weather Channel How many times has this happened to you? You get up in the morning, grab a cup of coffee, put on The Weather Channel to check the...
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I Don’t Hate Her, She Don’t Hate Me
I Don’t Hate Her, She Don’t Hate Me Could there be sweeter words to a mediator’s ears? I seriously doubt it. These were words said by a client as he and his soon-to-be former spouse were walking out of...
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Leaning Back, Thinking Forward
Leaning Back, Thinking Forward The prevailing wisdom in mediation is that we start with where our clients are (the present) and assist them as they move forward (the future). We don’t spend much time...
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The Art and Danger of Distracting Ourselves
The Art and Danger of Distracting Ourselves Frasier: The five-time Emmy Award winning Best Comedy series, garnering an unprecedented total of 37 Emmys during its 11 season run from 1993 – 2004. And for...
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It Didn’t Occur to Them to Look at the Trees
It Didn’t Occur to Them to Look at the Trees One of the most important things we do as mediators is to help our clients come to mutual agreements with each other. When I say mutual agreements, this...
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The Declaration of Independence – Pretty Radical Stuff
The Declaration of Independence – Pretty Radical Stuff I’m thinking about July 4th. Our national holiday celebrated with picnics, store sales, sporting events, fireworks….fun, fun and more fun. It’s...
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Torquing The Lug Nuts
{4:12 minutes to read} My worst nightmare. I’m on my way to visit my sister in New Hampshire and halfway there, barreling off 290 E in Massachusetts onto 495 N, when I first hear it and then smell it –...
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The Storm Before the Calm
{3:30 minutes to read} Jim* sat there during the third session, looking like someone who had been shot from a cannon. This was clearly still not easy for him, not by a long shot. Ann* had been...
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How Do I Broach the “I Want a Separation” Conversation?
{4:36 minutes to read} . . . with great care, concern and compassion. Easier said than done, I know. There are times when a potential client inquiring about my mediation services will tell me that...
View ArticleSeparation/Divorce: Hoist With Your Own Petard
When people ask me what is necessary in order for […]
View ArticleDo You Always Have to Have it Your Way?
Who hasn’t been there at one time or another; caught […]
View ArticleYou Have the Right to Remain Silent
{4:00 minutes to read} That’s right. Not every comment, statement, […]
View ArticleThe Loaded Costs of Litigation vs. Mediation [VIDEO]
When couples decide to litigate their divorce, they are often surprised by the costs of that process. The costs fall into three areas: financial; time; and emotional well being. This video compares...
View ArticleUpdating Your Divorce Agreement (VIDEO)
The result of a successful mediation is usually a Settlement Agreement crafted by the divorcing parties during their mediation sessions. With time, a return to mediation might be necessary as some...
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